7

7 years ago tomorrow, this was me at just a few minutes after 12:40 pm. Sage Alexandra Spence. 6 lbs, 14 oz. 20 inches long. Perfect. On January 19th, 2005, 3 days past my due date, extremely hormonal and basically a walking manifestation of evil, I formed an instant bond with Dr Collins, who induced me at what I thought would be a regular appointment that afternoon. As we watched American Idol tonight, memories of watching the same show flooded back to me in the hospital 7 years ago on THIS night, the 19th. I was being hooked up and pumped up with all kinds of drugs that made me half nuts (I immediately started laughing when they pushed the medicine into my IV), but I had to see who would win that night. Not that it mattered...because THIS would happen the next afternoon.

I held a literal piece of Heaven in my arms and my life would drastically change. Suddenly, the world was brighter. I felt my purpose come alive, and I knew that in my life, at the age of 22, I had just become the most important thing I could ever or would ever become: a mother. What pure joy. I started out today just looking for ONE particular picture of Sage. Yesterday I gave away a rocking horse that was her's from her first Christmas (I had a twinge of grief when I did but...I can't save everything), and I instantly had a mental image of a pic that I KNOW is here of her on that horse with 3 of her babies, her binky and a smile. I have yet to find it, but what I did find were a lot of other memories that I hadn't visited in a long time. What a joy Sage has been in our lives.

She was an instant beauty, and I always had headbands, bows and jewelry on her. I guess now, at the age of 7, when it takes us 45 minutes just to walk out the door after already being completely ready because Sage is getting that last accessory that she knows she needs, I have myself to thank. This was the day of her baby dedication, and I can still remember someone walking up to me, looking at her JUST like this in my arms, and asking if I'd had a boy or girl. No lie.

She was SUCH a fun baby, and I taught her how to get her praise on before she was 12 months old. We broke it down.

Daddy was the one to give her the candy even as a baby. She wasn't even a year old here.

THIS is Sage looking at Isacah. Nostalgia, you have hit me across the face.

When Sage was smaller, she LOVED her babies, and this was a day in the life. I hadn't seen these images in a LONG time, and it brought such a smile to me when I saw it today. And maybe some tears.

This was Valentine's Day, and she had just turned 2. And THAT doll...is baby. That's what she called it, and it was her favorite. It got to be so disgusting because she carried it EVERYWHERE and did everything to it that Holly asked me why I got toys from the Center of Hope. ;) But here, baby is looking so fresh and so clean, clean.

My goodness. Literally

My best girl

EEK! Before we got Mayer, Chanel was free to roam the house, so Sage was like Chanel's mother. Chanel had just gotten fixed here, and Travis had just brought her home from the vet. As soon as Travis carried her inside the house, she laid down in the floor to go to sleep. I'd explained to Sage that Chanel had had surgery and she had to be gentle. I walked out of the room and came back to this. Nurse Sage.

And this was just a regular day. All of her babies were always face down and covered up. Chanel was never an exception. Awwww.

The day we got Mayer...

Sage was 2. And he was 5 weeks old.

Look at our family. Sage was 4 months here, and this was our first night out alone since she'd been born. My mom was still living with us while I was finishing school. She took care of Sage for 7 1/2 months until I graduated. I know on this night we went to Fuji for dinner and wondered what Sage was doing. Then we went to walmart to get bottle liners...and ran into someone and talked about Sage..and hurried home to make sure we hadn't missed anything too amazing.

Such a delight.

heehee. This was her first Thanksgiving at my mom's house. Just a few minutes later after this picture was taken, she would bump her head on the chair that Travis was sitting in and get her first knot on her head.

This was her first day of preschool at Word Alive. She hated it. And dry heaved until they called me to get her early. Looking back...I wish I hadn't put her in so soon. Because after that, she never stopped going to some type of mom's day out or preschool until she started kindergarten. This is why Jaggar isn't in anything like that. I realize how precious time is and how little of it I really have. Is that to say he'll never go to preschool? No. Just not at 2...and possibly not at 3. :)

Always a fashionista

She loved to lay in the laundry basket and have Daddy push her around. Actually, she would still love that. :)

On the merry go round at Chuck E Cheese. I see Jaggar make that same face now.

This was the morning of her first day at Word Alive...I should have taken it as a sign when a child who has NEVER slept in had to be woken up out of a dead sleep that day.

:)

I will never forget this one. I can SEE my love for her in this.

This is so scattered because I've been up and down so many lanes of memories today that I don't have one concise point...or maybe I do. Sage, you're the best thing that ever happened to me. I am honored each and every day that God would lend me His best to love, nurture and influence before you start making your own decisions. At just a few minutes shy of being 7 years old, you are able to make some now, and I have been overwhelmed at the humbleness, thoughtfulness, sincerity, generosity and overall love that you show in all that you do at all times. You are better than me. You are 7, and you are so big now. You're growing up so much. Thank you for being so patient with me as I'm growing with you. I am so proud of you, but more importantly, God is. I know that the pictures I am taking of you NOW...where you look so big and sassy will all too soon become like these same pictures of memories. So because of that, I hold them and YOU...close.