Pictures for the Story

I haven't had time or desire to upload pictures to my computer since I've been home, and what I wrote previously was so long that I figured I'd do pictures separately anyway. Basically, it was too much to do at one time.

Here is what Sage's finger looked like on Monday, the day before I took her to her pediatrician. She'd drained what very little bit of infection was in it, and that is neosporin on it. It never looked horrible...but it was redder than it was at the beach. I don't know..it just wasn't right to me.

This was on Tuesday, the day of her appointment and what would be the final hours of what we knew as normal. We spend a few hours swimming everyday, and that has not changed.

This was in the ER...poor Jaggar. He didn't know what was going on all week. Picture taking wasn't at the top of my list at the time, but Chrissie snapped one. They looked cute so I took one, too.

This was probably the first morning in the hospital. Sage asked me to take a picture, I think. I wasn't exactly having a time I wanted to remember, but it's good. I think it's important for people to understand that she was okay. People ask me how she is. She was never sick. She never felt sick. Let me be clear: Sage LOVED being in the hospital. Yes, it's true. She said, "I love being served. I get to lay in bed all day and be served." Meanwhile, I'm sleeping on what feels like a card table where they brought me NOTHING. Yes, a Children's Hospital that requires an adult to stay brings them nothing...except crackers. I swore I lost 5 lbs while in there. But Sage was enjoying the service thoroughly, and that's no exaggeration. I will say that I've noticed a positive difference in her attitude since we've been home. She does seem like she feels better, even though she can't tell...I can at this point.

Only my child would bedazzle her IV. Chrissie brought Sage a ton of crafty type things to do. Sage couldn't watch TV when the nurses were in our room teaching, so she played with some of the things that Chrissie brought or watched movies on Chrissie's ipad that she left with us while we were there.

Chrissie sent this to me one morning. Harrison wrote this all by himself. I cried. Childlike faith. It will get the job done.

This stethoscope was in the room, and Sage played with it a lot. She thought it was great. She'd put it on my stomach and swore she heard the baby's heartbeat. The baby, who was more active in those midnight hours of laying there in that hospital room, than he'd EVER been in his weeks long length of existence.

So right before we left on Friday, the doctors came in one more time to answer any questions we had and discharge us. As they left, the attending physician saw Sage playing with the stethoscope and said, "You can take that home if you'd like." Santa himself couldn't have topped that for her.

Yes, it took two wagons to get all of the stuff out. I had never been more ready yet terrified to leave. I'd say this was more terrifying than leaving with a newborn. Sage's friend, Cailin, and family (who we picked berries with) sent her those pretty flowers. I just now threw them out today. They were so pretty and lasted a long time.

As soon as we left, I met Chrissie at Brookwood mall to get Jaggar. This...frog was in the food court, and of course, Jaggar ambushed him. Jaggar would have a breakdown from excitement if we went to Disney World. He is obsessed with characters. Sage was thrilled to see her friends and show them how she can get a shot and not cry. We totally went for it and had Chick-fil-a right there. Isacah and Harrison were fascinated with Sage getting a shot. Sage has never cried about this, and she even pricks her own finger...4 times a day. It's pretty amazing how brave she's been. Never complains. Since we've been home, we've had to do 2am blood sugar checks because they keep changing things to get it regulated. They call this the honeymoon period, where they say her pancreas will still have a few cells left that work, making it very difficult to regulate. You never know when those cells will come out, so dosing her with insulin on top of this causes these unexpected lows..and you just have to deal with it and pretty much guess. I personally...and I don't KNOW...but I believe we have to get through this before God heals her. Otherwise, they're going to say it's the honeymoon period. It is VERY nerve wracking because she tends to go too low in the nights. She started at 6 units of the long acting insulin, and today they have taken her down to 3.5. But that has been gradual, so every time they make a change, that is 3 more nights of 2 am blood sugar checks. I will be MORE than happy for that to end. I. AM. Exhausted. I have been up at 2 am...sometimes for extended lengths of time since we were in the hospital. And yet...I find it hard to sleep because I'm making sure she's okay. God did remind me that He that watches over us never slumbers or sleeps though. I know He is in control, and this had a definite beginning...and it also has a definite end.

Two days after we got home, Sage went to a birthday party. It was important for me that she felt normal. She had cake and ice cream just like every other kid there. It was a flip flop party, and they gave flip flops as a favor to the guests. Sage was excited that she was given Old Navy shoes like I already had. She also wanted to know why the veins in my feet stuck out. It could be because I haven't sat down in a week, but I don't know. ;) jk.

This is the picture of the rainbow that I mentioned that Sage drew me in the car a few days after we got home. All of those rainbows I'd seen before this happened didn't hit me until she handed me this picture, and then they ALL came flooding back. I realized what God had been saying.

And here we are now. We swim every day. We play. Sage is eating more food than she has in her life. Jaggar asks if he can do it whenever he sees us give her a shot or she pricks her finger. He wants to do it to HER, not himself. He's very serious, too. It's very new to us: all of it. Sometimes, it's overwhelming. Sometimes, it's overwhelming a LOT of times, but in those times, God always shows Himself strong to me. And I have strength to keep going because this is a fight we are going to win. We already HAVE.